Unhealthy Self Esteem in Children
Unhealthy self esteem in children is something I have been thinking about for quite some time. Dr. John Roseman in his book, “Parenting By the Book” is what got my mind to really thinking seriously about this subject. By unhealthy self esteem I am talking about a high self esteem. You know the kid that thinks they are so special they deserve everything they want.
“If you love me you will keep my commandments” John 4:15 Jesus doesn’t tell us that we have to obey him. He doesn’t threaten us or reward us into obeying him. God doesn’t force us to believe the Christ was His son. Goodness knows He makes a strong case about it and with all the prophecies in the Old Testament how could we not? But still it is each person’s individual choice to believe or not.
Oswald Chamber in his book, “My Utmost for His Highest” says on the devotion for November 2nd, “God never insists on obedience.” God also never forces His will upon us. It is always our decision and we should want to do His will because we love Him. Also I think because when we truly love God we respect God and who He is.
The high self esteem concept could be the reason kids are so out of control today. Think about this, in the Bible it talks about in the end times how children will turn away from their parents. “Children will rebel against their parents…..” Mark 13:12 NIV Well, we certainly have kids turning away from their parents in our world today. Kids today are disobedient to parents, teachers, church and government and to God. But then again why shouldn’t they be? We have raised children with this self esteem concept. Schools and day cares tout that we should not destroy a child’s self esteem. Therapist and counselors work with parents all the time to help raise a child’s self esteem. Even in some churches we are careful not to do anything that might affect a child’s self esteem.
In raising their self esteem and keeping their little psychic’s in tact we have turned them into little beings and then adult beings where everything is about “ME”! “But I WANT that toy” says to many parents that they have to purchase the toy. Think about the cheating in school; the addiction to drugs and alcohol – “but it makes me feel good”. All of these issues are ultimately about what I WANT and about ME. Curse anyone else’s feelings – the world revolves around me.
What have we done as a society? We have raised an entire generation with entitlement issues. “But I am entitled to feel this way; to have what I want; I deserve to be rewarded.” Don’t you imagine Bernie Madoff said these things to himself when he stole all that money. Even after his arrest and sentencing his wife still thought she deserved to live in her mansion and live in the life style she was accustomed to living.
(Sorry I digress!!!)
Self worth, self respect and a healthy self esteem are all good and needed in our kids today.
Living, breathing, trusting and loving God is foreign to many of our children and teens today. Because to believe, to respect, to trust and to love God would no longer be about “ME”!